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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27013888">strike a match (watch it burn)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/eustomas/pseuds/eustomas'>eustomas</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Final Fantasy XIV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Multi, Mutual Pining, i live for ot3s and this ot3 specifically, lapslock, look man idk, technically still getting together</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:20:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,934</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27013888</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/eustomas/pseuds/eustomas</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>oh, darling, don't you want to hear a secret? quiet now, listen carefully—</p><p> </p><p>----</p><p>or, alternatively, a series of first kisses</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aymeric de Borel/Haurchefant Greystone, Aymeric de Borel/Haurchefant Greystone/Estinien Wyrmblood, Haurchefant Greystone/Estinien Wyrmblood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>124</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>strike a match (watch it burn)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>whats up, i scraped together some words for this thing ive had laying around since august and i dont remember any of them, enjoy</p><p>(threw in two snippets from my collection bc they were Relevant and count as like like, idk, context ig)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <ol>
<li><em> secrets</em></li>
</ol><p>the mulled wine is warm in their cups; the heat of the hearth even warmer; and the warrior of light hanging off his shoulder, cheeks flushed red, eyes glinting full of excitement, is the warmest of all. tis a comforting warmth, one that brings him such great joy to see — his dear friend resting and making merry for once in her short time here. it is a moment he shall treasure dearly.</p><p>and the stories she's telling, those he shall treasure even more,</p><p>"and then! then alberic sends me to the...the…oh, i don't remember what it's called?" she starts giggling, laughing at herself, "it doesn't matter! what matters is that i met the love of my life there!" she proclaims, triumphant, raising her cup and laughing again when the wine spills between her fingers.</p><p>"is that so, my friend? and you inform me only now? why, i feel utterly slighted!"</p><p>"noo, no, no, no," she reaches for him; misses his shoulder and grabs his ear instead; overbalances and falls in a mess of limbs on his lap and then the floor. </p><p>"no, you silly man, i <em>couldn't </em>tell you before," she says with urgency, completely missing the amusement in his voice, "because i have a <em>plan</em>!"</p><p>"pray tell me who it involves first," haurchefant idly attempts to wrestle her into a lying position and she complies, lets him move her limbs this way and that. she only sighs dreamily in response.</p><p>"her name is heustienne and she is the swiftest, most graceful dragoon i've ever seen." there's a brief pause. "please don't tell estinien i said that."</p><p>she looks so genuinely distressed it makes him break into a laugh.</p><p>"your secret is safe with me, i promise you."</p><p>she only looks at him then, dazed; stares as if seeing him for the first time. </p><p>"haurchefant," her voice is grave.</p><p>"yes, my friend?"</p><p>"who's the love of <em>your</em> life?"</p><p>the question catches him off guard — just a bit, just enough for him to hesitate. in the briefest moment of silence that passes, he considers how much to tell her</p><p>(if he should at all)</p><p>
  <em>would you like to know that years ago ser aymeric and i fooled around as young temple knights? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>would you like to know that i was his first kiss? that it still strikes a blaze within me whenever i think of it?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>would you like to know that i have not stopped thinking of it for even a day?</em>
</p><p>but it's a foolish endeavor, one that can lead nowhere. haurchefant knows what is to be his place, knows what can never be in ishgard </p><p>(and the list is so very long)</p><p>so he laughs instead, raises an eyebrow and turns his expression into something cheeky,</p><p>"are you worried i'd try to steal your lovely dragoon for myself?"</p><p>and in the moment she takes to process the words, the second it takes for her eyebrows to furrow in confusion, then, he thinks of—</p><p>
  <em>silver hair a mess, a vicious snarl and dirt on his cheeks, blue eyes alit, burning, burning; an impossibly graceful figure leaping into the air—</em>
</p><p>(there is a different dragoon he'd like to steal for himself.)</p><p>"what? no, of course not, don't be ridiculous," she scrambles to sit up, puts her hands on his shoulders meaningfully. stares right into his eyes. " no, it's about <em>the</em> <em>plan — </em>i get the girl, obviously, but i'll need your help." she leans their faces close, lowers her voice, turns it conspiratorial. </p><p>"and in return, i help <em>you</em> get the love of your life."</p><p>tis such a sweet sentiment; his dear friend so resolute and ready, so determined to act. sweet, for all that it is futile. it makes him smile warmly regardless, fondness clear in his eyes, because how fortunate is he to have such a person by his side?</p><p>"alas, i doubt there is anything to be done. better to let the matter rest."</p><p>the look on her face says the exact opposite, so he steers the conversation back to her, asks increasingly more and more scandalous questions to distract her until the entire topic is forgotten altogether.</p><p>it is not the relief he'd hoped it would be.</p><p> </p><ol>
<li><em> begin</em></li>
</ol><p>it is a tentative friendship at first, one that only grows and grows with the passing days — shared backgrounds and shared want to serve, to better their precious city; those are the links that bring them together at the start.</p><p>the rest is, as they say, history. </p><p>there is not one person in the whole of ishgard who'd be able to truly resist the charms of one haurchefant greystone, lest of all aymeric. </p><p>it begins as a bud, small and fragile, something aymeric nurtures slowly and carefully with each passing conversation, every word exchanged. it begins with laughter between them, with haurchefant pulling him along towards reckless, mischievous things, playful roughhousing and more serious scuffles, spars that leave them both panting for breath, evenly matched. </p><p>it continues with hopeful smiles on both their faces, grand dreams of the future, of a better ishgard, of a better life for their people, of change. conversations until past curfew, hushed whispers and shared aspirations, a deep sense of understanding between them, a feeling of belonging.</p><p>it should not be so surprising then, that what was once a small bud has now grown into so much more, blossomed into something bright and beautiful without him noticing.</p><p>bright, beautiful, private and intimate and aymeric's breath catches in his throat, his lungs refusing to work.</p><p>it has little to do with the physical extortion and everything with how haurchefant hovers above him, straddling his hips, pinning him down by his wrists, their swords and shields discarded somewhere on the side, long forgotten.</p><p>he is victorious in this fight, grinning, vibrant, a burning flame.</p><p>"looks like i win."</p><p>aymeric stares dumbfounded for a second, something wild and all consuming unfurling in his chest, an epiphany that has him stunned. he cannot move, cannot bring himself to form words, merely looks at haurchefant as if a new sun has risen in the sky, some new light shining on him.</p><p>he looks a mess — hair tousled, glinting silver and blue in the fading sunlight; eyes bright, his breath fogging in small clouds in front of him. he leans towards aymeric slightly, tilts his head just the tiniest bit, curious, and aymeric realizes they're suddenly so very close.</p><p>haurchefant's lips are curled in a cheeky grin, inviting, welcoming, and a terrible, awful, reckless thought forms his mind. the moment between them drags for another second, a small eternity. </p><p>aymeric decides to be impulsive for once.</p><p>haurchefant's hold on his wrists slowly turns lax and aymeric wastes no time, surges <em>up</em>. haurchefant clearly isn't expecting it, a small, surprised <em>mngh—? </em>all the reaction he gets before aymeric is pressing their lips together. it is a quick, chaste thing, barely a brush, barely a touch to be felt, but it is enough.</p><p>enough to shift their weight, get an arm around haurchefant's shoulder and <em>twist</em>, flip them over and look down, down at wide eyes and pink lips and flushed cheeks.</p><p>(something heavy settles in aymeric's gut, hot like molten silver, spills through his veins and sets him aflame)</p><p>((there will be no coming back from this))</p><p>"looks like <em>i </em>win." his voice comes out teasing, full of self-satisfaction he cannot hide. there is only laughter in response, one that tinkles like bells in his ears.</p><p>"oh, you are still mistaken, my friend," haurchefant grins, quick, always so quick to understand, "i'm all the more winner for this."</p><p>his laughter tastes sweet on aymeric's lips, again and again and again.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>(the bud grows and blossoms and becomes a garden)</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><ol>
<li><em> fall</em></li>
</ol><p>there is <em>some </em>beauty, estinien admits begrudgingly, to be found in the icy hellscape coerthas have become. the central highlands not offer overly much in the way of stunning views: snow undisturbed for as far as the eye can see, a soft blanket to hug the frozen remains of the land, to coat it all in blinding white. jagged rocks and broken off pieces of ice create sharp, sinister silhouettes; pine trees creaking mournfully in the wind.</p><p>it feels eerie, feels like something haunting — ghosts that can find no rest, remnants of the past frozen in time. a deep sense of loss and stillness grows heavier by the minute, the barren lands that surround them just that — barren, empty, harsh in their coldness.</p><p>mayhap all the supposed beauty there is is to be found somewhere else after all, for estinien feels only cold and hungry and—</p><p>"you know, you do glare an awful lot, even for someone meant to be on watch duty. is aught amiss, perhaps?"</p><p>and nervous. the fortemps knight makes him nervous. </p><p><em>haurchefant of the silver fuller, </em>his brain supplies helpfully, and estinien knows this, knows him. aymeric has introduced them in passing, once, before,</p><p>
  <em>("—my dear friend, ser haurchefant."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"i've heard many a tale of your battles, ser estinien. 'tis an honor to finally make your acquaintance!")</em>
</p><p>they've exchanged pleasantries as is expected, but they are not friends. </p><p>
  <em>(it is the sincerity in his voice that estinien does not know what to do with, the genuine way ser haurchefant beams at him. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>it feels foreign, to receive such things from someone other than aymeric.)</em>
</p><p>there has been no real conversation between them for the past bells, nothing beyond stray observations and offhand comments. estinien stands, metaphorically, on unstable ground here. their relationship gives him no clue on how to act, unclear as it is; aymeric the single loose thread that connects them.</p><p>he has heard the stories, of course. haurchefant greystone — only bastard of house fortemps; the one who'd saved one of the haillenarte lordlings at seventeen, untrained, with barely a knife in his hands. he is an honorable knight, devout, dedicated to a cause, sworn to service of the holy see like so many others and somehow still so unlike them.</p><p>estinien does not know what to make of him. </p><p>it is difficult to reconcile what he knows with the man who stands next to him, one so…upbeat. cheerful and positive and prone to waxing poetics about their surroundings and whatever else he can think of. it is jarring, to say the least. such a seemingly carefree disposition must hide much underneath the surface — it leaves estinien wary. </p><p>"nay."</p><p>the answer comes out curt, clipped, and after a pause that has lasted too long. it does not deter the other knight in the least, it seems, as he continues talking as if no time has passed at all,</p><p>"there is something i've been wondering for the longest time now and i see no better opportunity to ask—" here he suddenly stops. estinien cautiously turns towards him, as if the question is somehow dangerous.</p><p>ridiculous.</p><p>"what is it?" </p><p>haurchefant seems to consider his next words carefully.</p><p>"i know ser aymeric holds you in high regard, but pray tell me, what do you make of <em>him</em>?"</p><p>estinien stays quiet for a long time before answering.</p><p>it feels precarious to answer this, to give words to such sentiment — a cliff's edge, and he cannot be certain how far under the ground is. haurchefant's gaze feels like an arbiter's blade hanging above his head.</p><p>"aymeric is a fool." he says finally, looking into the distance to avoid the other man's eyes. there is only snow, white and undisturbed.</p><p>"he's an utter fool, and the only one in this cursed city that i trust in. all that change he talks about, fury damn it all, i trust him to truly bring it about."</p><p>there's quiet footsteps behind him; haurchefant moving to stand shoulder to shoulder next to him.</p><p>it is endlessly irritating, the scant ilms taller that he is, how estinien has to look up just slightly to meet his eyes. estinien wants to — do something about it. he doesn't know what, but it infuriates him constantly; makes him bite down on an impulsive, reckless urge.</p><p>"and here i was, worrying if i'll have to defend my friend's honor, " haurchefant smiles down at him and just like every time, estinien doesn't know what to <em>do</em> with it; haurchefant's expression warm and playful and so <em>genuine</em>. it's disarming. estinien feels how his face flushes and he writes it off as an aftereffect of the cold.</p><p>
  <em>ridiculous.</em>
</p><p>"such noble knights in shining armor you are, the both of you," estinien scoffs, kicking at the snow at his feet. it scatters in a shower of snowflakes and he glares at it intently to avoid looking at haurchefant greystone's stupidly charming face.</p><p>"oh, come now! i know you're not so prickly underneath, despite the frankly abysmal reputation that precedes you, <em>ser</em> <em>estinien</em>." there's the sound of faint rustling behind him. estinien does not turn to look. </p><p>"what these swiveling pissants have to say is of no interest to me," he spits out, full of vitriol, and the response he gets in return is a surprised bark of good-natured laughter. it takes estinien off guard; makes him turn, just slightly, just to look out of the corner of his eye— </p><p>"well said, my friend, well said!" and estinien feels like he's passed some sort of test.</p><p>it occurs to him then — <em>bastard, whoreson, wretch; </em>the whispers that must trail after him just like how they trail after aymeric on most days. no wonder he doesn't put much stock in the gossip that follows estinien either.</p><p>“i must say, i did have some reservations of mine own when aymeric told me of your glorious dragon hunt together,” haurchefant begins conversationally, his tone light. he regards estinien warmly, hands behind his back and his expression open. “even more so when he started—” he cuts himself off suddenly, “—telling me at length about your growing friendship.”</p><p>“and?”</p><p>“and now i see i was wrong, fortunately.”</p><p>“say what else you have to say, <em>ser,</em>” estinien interrupts, growing impatient, “and speak plainly.”</p><p>the other man waves one hand in the air placatively, “please, there’s no need for such formality between us.” he moves the other one too, holds it out, and now estinien sees the snowball laying in his palm, round and unassuming. “i simply have a request, if you would be so kind to indulge me.”</p><p>estinien stares at him in confusion.</p><p>“well? are you going to step up to the challenge, future azure dragoon of ishgard?”</p><p>“step up to the—?” the snowball hits him square in the face.</p><p>there's a moment of silence as the snow clears out of his eyes, slips down quietly, and a large, mischievous smirk spreads on haurchefant’s face.</p><p>estinien tackles him to the fucking ground.</p><p>they both fall down, rocks and slippery ice be damned. haurchefant doesn't react quite fast enough but he still retaliates, and they end up tumbling in the fresh snow once, twice, until estinien manages to secure a hold and remain on top. </p><p>they grapple like boys.</p><p>estinien frees a hand to scoop up a generous amount of snow and just <em>throws. </em>it brings him great satisfaction to see it smatter all over haurchefant’s hair and fall down his collar.</p><p>“oh, you do <em>not</em> play fair, do you,” it is said breathlessly and with absolutely no amount of surprise, not even close to a question. estinien grins to match the expression on haurchefant’s face.</p><p>it quickly slips away, however, when a well-aimed blow to the ribs takes him unawares, knocks the breath out of his chest and ends with snow in his mouth. estinien reaches blindly through the snowmelt and moisture in his eyes; feels strands between his fingers and he pulls. haurchefant yelps—</p><p>"i see i was right to worry about you two being assigned duty together."</p><p>aymeric. </p><p>they both immediately freeze, estinien's hand still fisted in haurchefant's hair, tugging, a handful of snow raised ominously in the other. he looks at aymeric as he approaches from the distance and haurchefant <em>laughs</em> under him, the bastard, uses the distraction to his advantage. </p><p>suddenly estinien finds himself on the ground, snowflakes settling quietly all around him, melting on his face. haurchefant looks no better: snow in his hair, down his neck, cheeks a rosy pink, breath laboured and an awfully smug grin on his face. </p><p>estinien wants to wipe it off with his <em>teeth.</em></p><p>"why do you say that, my friend? can't you see we're getting along perfectly?"</p><p>"oh, i'll show you perfect—" estinien growls, makes to lunge forward, but haurchefant raises swiftly to his feet in a blink and estinien grabs empty air instead. he wants to scream.</p><p>haurchefant bows respectfully as aymeric approaches them, the very definition of innocence — the look in aymeric's eyes says he doesn't believe it for a second. quietly, estinien sits up. he shakes the snow out of his hair and meticulously pats his armor off before getting to his feet; all to avoid looking at aymeric's face and the things that reside there. it makes something unfamiliar lodge itself in his throat uncomfortably.</p><p>"i come with summons to fetch you — your post has been reassigned and you are to return with me back to ishgard."</p><p>"praise the fury." estinien deadpans, dusting leftover snow off his gloves.</p><p>"why the long face, my friend? i'd say we had a great time together!" that menace of a man says cheerfully and even has the gall to wrap an arm around estinien's shoulder, as if estinien hadn't tried to claw his eyes out five seconds prior. "we may have gotten slightly sidetracked, but we got along just fine, didn't we?"</p><p>whatever scathing response must've been at the tip of his tongue dies the moment he glances at aymeric, at his extremely, stupidly charming face and the disgusting, unspeakable fondness in his eyes when he looks at the two of them. estinien mumbles out something unintelligible, something that might be an agreement under the right circumstances, and keeps glaring at the damned snow. </p><p>fury help him, how is he supposed to deal with two of them now.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><ol>
<li><em> wait</em></li>
</ol><p>"are the quarters not to your liking?" </p><p>estinien barely turns his head to glare at the figure in the doorway. he doesn't deign to give a response, just glances again out the window.</p><p>"oh, come now, my friend,  i thought we were past the brooding silences by now?"</p><p>estinien remains silent. </p><p>there's a soft sigh and quiet, measured footsteps in his direction. haurchefant leans against the corner of the nearby table; sets down the two steaming mugs and <em>looks</em> at estinien, entirely too patient and unflinching. estinien feels his resolve crumble just slightly.</p><p>"the blizzard should be gone by morning and you will be free to continue on your merry way, i promise you." haurchefant gestures to the entirety of the room. "i've told you more than once you are always welcome to stay here."</p><p>estinien finally turns away from the window, from the sight of endless falling white and the howling winds blowing a flurry of sleet and ice. the last vigil is unrecognizable; hells, anything farther than a yalm is already unrecognizable, nevermind that. it has been bells since the snowfall first started and it shows no sign of stopping any time soon. it makes him sigh, frustrated.</p><p>such is winter in ishgard.</p><p>"i must say, i was rather surprised to see you at the front door," haurchefant begins lightly, one of the mugs already in his hands, steam slowly rising from it. he blows gently before taking a small sip. estinien stares. the air smells of mulled wine and spices; warm and rich and heavy. it is distracting.</p><p>"how is it that aymeric made you of all people play messenger?" haurchefant asks when estinien gives no response.</p><p>"perhaps he hoped you would not shirk the paperwork if i were to present it to you."</p><p>this, finally, makes haurchefant laugh quietly, a small smile on his lips, "ah, our dear lord commander — always a dreamer at heart, isn't he?" </p><p>and estinien cannot help but agree privately.</p><p>"pray tell me, what truly has you so bothered? surely a night spent in fortemps manor to wait out a blizzard is not <em>that</em> cruel a fate to suffer?"</p><p>the truth is that estinien feels...unbalanced, uncertain; like that first time they were alone with each other and there had been no solid ground for him to thread on, no certain path to follow, their acquaintanceship as new as it had been. the months and years of friendship after should have remedied that already, should have laid a stable foundation to stand on, and they did, they <em>had, </em>but yet here he is again — damnably confused and irritated, both with himself and with the way these things affect him.</p><p>the truth is that estinien can barely look haurchefant in the eye now, too many thoughts rising to the surface of his mind when he looks for a moment too long.</p><p>the truth is—</p><p>
  <em>it was with haurchefant that i first—</em>
</p><p>"tis of no concern to you.” estinien turns towards the window and wills the blizzard away, his thoughts along with it too. </p><p>estinien glances towards the table, where his helmet rests next to haurchefant's hand. he feels exposed.</p><p>“how you wound me,” haurchefant says, his tone resigned. there is a long, contemplating pause.</p><p>"has something happened? have i done something to offend, perhaps?"</p><p>estinien grits his teeth, frustration gnawing at his insides — with himself, with aymeric, with the things he has so brazenly decided to share. the knowledge sits in his hands like a flaming coal, scorching, and he cannot be rid of it, cannot <em>forget</em>. </p><p>instead, his mind spins impossible tales and whispers whimsical desires; conjures image after image to torment him. it burns and burns.</p><p>
  <em>that i first—</em>
</p><p>estinien looks at haurchefant and imagines how aymeric would fit against him; how he would lean close and whisper syrup sweet words, tangle elegant fingers in pale hair and press closer, taste the promises sweet on his lips—</p><p>an unfamiliar feeling twists sharply in his gut, something he has no name for. it leaves him feeling raw, exposed; like he should be baring his teeth and warding off anyone who might think to look at it too closely.</p><p>"clearly i must have, for you to throw such a look my way. pray <em>tell</em> me then, that i may remedy it." estinien curses how damnably easy to read his face is.</p><p>"nay; tis nothing of—"</p><p>"estinien." his jaw snaps shut with a click. haurchefant's voice books no space for argument and <em>fury take it all, </em></p><p>"aymeric, he—mentioned, once, that you—" estinien bites on his tongue as if to stop the words. </p><p>the faint taste of copper is no relief — he has already said too much.</p><p>"he has finally told you then? i had wondered how long that would take." haurchefant takes a calm sip of his mulled wine, understanding clear in his eyes, and yet he looks not in the least bothered, as if they are merely conversing about the weather. like many of his previous interactions with him, it makes estinien want to pull at his hair in frustration.</p><p>"i'm surprised he's done it at all to be completely honest." he looks at estinien over the rim of his cup. "i thought the two of you would dance around each other until one day you died or i did."</p><p>"<em>what."</em></p><p>"oh, dearest," there is a blatant knowing in his eyes, an awareness that sets estinien on edge. "i am not as blind as i seem and you not nearly as subtle."</p><p>estinien <em>snarls.</em> </p><p>haurchefant sighs. he rises, slowly approaches estinien; stops a step away from him to lean against the other end of the window. there is barely a yalm between them.</p><p>estinien cannot make heads nor tails of haurchefant's expression, some unrecognizable mixture of feelings impossible for him to read. he has not the ability to name them so he turns away, looks to the flurry of endless white outside.</p><p>"before you jump out the window or bring me to an unfortunate end in my own home, please do hear what i have to say first." estinien glares. loudly. </p><p>haurchefant only sighs, fond and amused and absolutely terrible.</p><p>"you love him, that much is plain to me," his voice comes out soft, almost unbearably so, as if accepting, <em>pitying. </em>estinien can barely stand it; bites his tongue on poison and vitriol to remain silent. anything he says would only serve to condemn him.</p><p>"however, please do not be mistaken. i know not what exactly it is that aymeric has shared with you, but—" he purposefully moves closer, grabs at estinien's hand, makes estinien meet his gaze. many adjectives spring to mind to describe haurchefant in this moment, but foremost are <em>determined</em> and <em>resolute</em>. it is jarring, the intensity of it, the sudden closeness. </p><p>estinien's throat is parched.</p><p>"whatever arrangement may have been between aymeric and i, it is no longer of any import." there is weight in his words, something that sounds an awful lot like permission. "you are free to pursue whatever you desire, although that has never been in question with you." haurchefant releases his grip on estinien's hand, leaning back the tiniest bit. </p><p>estinien swallows. </p><p>"i will pursue nothing," he grits out, some flimsy attempt at denial.</p><p>"of course you won't." haurchefant shakes his head, smiling, fond. </p><p>a silence stretches between them, heavy and charged with all they aren't saying, all the implications. such topics are dangerous dealings in ishgard. it continues, endless, and estinien feels ready to crawl out of his skin, something restless thrumming loudly in his veins, until—</p><p>"i have an offer to make, if you will hear it." haurchefant sounds uncharacteristically tentative, unsure. it makes him wonder, so estinien allows himself a glimpse, and finds he cannot look away — there is an expression he has never seen before on his face. estinien lacks the words to describe it, to give it meaning. he nods instead, urging him to continue.</p><p>haurchefant gives an overexaggerated sigh; makes a show of shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders. the expression is gone.</p><p>"seeing as you must next court aymeric, i cannot in good conscience let you make a fool out of yourself—" </p><p>"i must <em>what—!?</em>"</p><p>"—i am generous enough to offer you what knowledge i possess." haurchefant has the gall to bow, as if this is some great display of charity and not—</p><p>not—</p><p>estinien does not know what to call this.</p><p>madness. stupidity. foolishness. </p><p>
  <em>(temptation)</em>
</p><p>the list of fitting names is too long to contemplate.</p><p>haurchefant raises an eyebrow in silent question. when no response is forthcoming, he sighs and takes a step forward. estinien resists the urge to take a step back.</p><p>"well? </p><p>"are you <em>mad—</em>"</p><p>"i am merely offering and nothing more," haurchefant says evenly, arms open, welcoming at his sides. "what you decide rests only upon you."</p><p>estinien hesitates.</p><p>it has always been like this with haurchefant, with aymeric, with haurchefant and aymeric — they are a warmth he does not know how to approach, how to take in his hands until the ice in his veins finally thaws. they keep trying, the thrice damned fools, but this is beyond reason, beyond anything he could ever prepare for.</p><p>there is a part of him, one that is small and fragile and bruised; all that is left of him that was spared from the flames and ashes of ferndale. it is a misbegotten thing that remembers what it is to hope and wish and want; to dream of more than just vengeance, more than blood and death and broken carcasses cold beneath his feet.</p><p>those fleeting dreams he tries to push away — they all come down to this in end.</p><p>the wind outside howls and estinien—</p><p>"show me then."</p><p>takes a leap.</p><p>"our aymeric, he is so very sweet," haurchefant trails barely there kisses along his jaw, a feather light touch of lips against his bare skin. it is teasing, and together with his words it has estinien shivering with anticipation. <em>our</em> makes a thrill run in his blood, something possessive in him preening, satisfied at the thought.</p><p>"you can kiss him any way you please and he would appreciate it, make this lovely noise," he stops just shy of the corner of estinien's mouth, "but he falls apart when you kiss him so."</p><p>it is impossibly gentle how haurchefant presses their lips together, slow and tender and with obvious intent, full of some meaning estinien cannot discern. the hand resting on his neck moves, tangles gently in his hair, and it only serves to deepen the kiss. it remains languid and unhurried, kissing for the sake of it, the enjoyment.</p><p>it makes him feel dazed; leaves him chasing after haurchefant when he pulls away. leaves him hungry for <em>more</em>.</p><p>"do you understand now?"</p><p>somewhere, a small, unburied part of estinien wonders, suddenly curious, <em>how do </em>you<em> like to be kissed?</em></p><p>but there is no time for idle musings, no space for those worn out thoughts. instead, he rests both hands on haurchefant's waist and pulls him as close as he can.</p><p>"show me again." estinien commands, voice almost a growl.</p><p>"with pleasure," </p><p>
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</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>(haurchefant has always had a penchant for self-sacrifice, and self-destruction isn't too far removed from it. </p><p>he knows he cannot have both, cannot really have<em> either</em>, so he allows himself this instead — a taste to haunt all his dreams and strain all that they are, a night where he can pretend.</p><p>
  <em>i am right here. </em>
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  <em>make me yours. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>make me yours.)</em>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>idk dont look at me!! i love the concept of pining third haurchefant with destined comrades in arms soulmates estimeric!! i Will...mke them...Communicate at some point...Talk it Out............it will Happen, i Swear...................</p><p>also in this house we do Not regard the events of the vault as canon, bye</p><p>find me on <a href="https://twitter.com/eeustomas/">twt</a> if u wanna yell abt things together</p></blockquote></div></div>
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